Diamond, I only read one page of the exchange over on headfi, but it doesn't look like this has been a nightmare at every step, but an on-going building/tweaking project that had moments in which you were very happy with the system, moments of great disappointment, and moments when it was ok, but had some problems that needed sorting out. It would also appear that you've given your builder some money that you think should be returned, and have withheld some money that he thinks is still owed.
Hardly a clear story of right and wrong.
Folks around here can tell you I'm hardly one to defend "professional" tweakers, but what do you hope to gain by airing all of this publicly? If you have legal recourse, take it. But you can't ruin the reputation of someone who has none, and while these stories make him look incompetent, they're equally effective at making you look gullible. The first time you visited and found him working on your system in his mom's kitchen with inadequate tools was the moment of truth. You should have paid no more money from that point on, until the first component was delivered and tested (independently), and proved to perform at least as well as the manufacturer's component that he was mutilating. Actually, you should have visited his mom's kitchen and seen the tools and some of his "work," before you gave him the first dollar. Or better yet, you should have paid him $1000 to put competently designed and manufactured components in pretty wood boxes and given him a $500 bonus to leave the electronics untouched. But at this point? Time to cut your losses.
Tim