You cannot just take random, "industry standard" measurements without a hypothesis or model of why you are doing these particular measurements - it's laughable!
I can certainly take a variety of "industry standard" measurements and apply them directly to the great deal we know about both monaural and binaural hearing, and come to supported conclusions.
Why is that laughable?
Hearing is not a mystery, it is reasonably well understood, and the sensitivities of the hearing apparatus at the periphery are also established to a fair-thee-well. That means that we know quite well what information actually gets to the brain, and what isn't even detected.
And even "mostly useless' measurements like SNR can, if large enough, provide assurance.
If I am characterizing something I will certainly be doing more than impulse response and SNR.
I see no support for your arguments about interchannel timing jitter, among other things, they don't account for the rather intense spectral distortion such jitter would cause. I will say that there are things, like scrape flutter in tape decks, that work that way due to physics, but if that's your point why don't you just say you
PREFER stuff that goes through a tape deck? That's your choice, and nobody gets to argue what YOU prefer for your own listening.
You are, I trust, aware that there are things called "euphonic distortions". Now, the euphony is at the listener, so there is not agreement on what is euphonic (at least to a great part) across the whole spectrum of listeners.