Movie Quote Fun

[JackD201]

Jim: Guys, uh, what exactly does third base feel like?
Kevin: You want to take this one?
Oz: Like warm apple pie.
Jim: Yeah?
Oz: Yeah.
Jim: Apple pie, huh?
Oz: Uh huh.
Jim: McDonald's or homemade?"

-American Pie

 

[Ron Party]

In our forum, after approximately 80 posts, I'm amazed no one has put forth some poetic quotes from the greatest mockumentary film, This Is Spinal Tap. Just a small sampling:

[Nigel is playing a soft piece on the piano]
Marty DiBergi: It's very pretty.
Nigel Tufnel: Yeah, I've been fooling around with it for a few months.
Marty DiBergi: It's a bit of a departure from what you normally play.
Nigel Tufnel: It's part of a trilogy, a musical trilogy I'm working on in D minor which is the saddest of all keys, I find. People weep instantly when they hear it, and I don't know why.
Marty DiBergi: It's very nice.
Nigel Tufnel: You know, just simple lines intertwining, you know, very much like - I'm really influenced by Mozart and Bach, and it's sort of in between those, really. It's like a Mach piece, really. It's sort of...
Marty DiBergi: What do you call this?
Nigel Tufnel: Well, this piece is called "Lick My Love Pump".

David St. Hubbins: Dozens of people spontaneously combust each year. It's just not really widely reported.

Nigel Tufnel: The numbers all go to eleven. Look, right across the board, eleven, eleven, eleven and...
Marty DiBergi: Oh, I see. And most amps go up to ten?
Nigel Tufnel: Exactly.
Marty DiBergi: Does that mean it's louder? Is it any louder?
Nigel Tufnel: Well, it's one louder, isn't it? It's not ten. You see, most blokes, you know, will be playing at ten. You're on ten here, all the way up, all the way up, all the way up, you're on ten on your guitar. Where can you go from there? Where?
Marty DiBergi: I don't know.
Nigel Tufnel: Nowhere. Exactly. What we do is, if we need that extra push over the cliff, you know what we do?
Marty DiBergi: Put it up to eleven.
Nigel Tufnel: Eleven. Exactly. One louder.
Marty DiBergi: Why don't you just make ten louder and make ten be the top number and make that a little louder?
Nigel Tufnel: These go to eleven.

Marty DiBergi: "This tasteless cover is a good indication of the lack of musical invention within. The musical growth of this band cannot even be charted. They are treading water in a sea of retarded sexuality and bad poetry."
Nigel Tufnel: That's just nitpicking, isn't it?

 

[rsbeck]

Classic!

"Smell the glove."

"I could be a haberdasher."

"Big bottom, big bottom...talk about mud flaps, my girl's got 'em"

"Don't even look at it. You've seen enough."

"Saucy Jack."

"Stonehenge.....see, it says eighteen feet"

"Isn't that the symbol for inches?"

-- Spinal Tap

 

[RogerD]

"What is life without adventure"
"Thank you ma'am may I have another?"
"Your'e a bad pony,I'm not going to bet on you"
"That was a Dinosaur con"
"The bitch is a booster"

Just some of the gems from "House of Games"

One of my all time favorite movies

 

[rsbeck]

Another classic!

"You see what you did? You cracked out of turn. You crumbed the play."

"You've got a tell."

"You came back like a dog to its own vomit, you sick bitch!"

-- House of Games

 

[rsbeck]

"He slimed me."

"Back off, man, I'm a scientist."

"You don't usually see that kind of behavior in a major appliance."

"Is this a trick question?"

"Who does your taxes?"

"Let's show this prehistoric bitch how we do things downtown!"

"What did you do, Ray?"


-- Ghostbusters

 

[RogerD]

And of course one of the greatest scripts ever written,

Gekko: The richest one percent of this country owns half our country's wealth, five trillion dollars. One third of that comes from hard work, two thirds comes from inheritance, interest on interest accumulating to widows and idiot sons – and what I do, stock and real estate speculation. It's bullshit. You got ninety percent of the American public out there with little or no net worth. I create nothing. I own. We make the rules, pal. The news, war, peace, famine, upheaval, the price per paper clip. We pick that rabbit out of the hat while everybody sits out there wondering how the hell we did it. Now, you're not naive enough to think we're living in a democracy, are you, buddy? It's the free market. And you're a part of it. You've got that killer instinct. Stick around, pal, I've still got a lot to teach you.

From the movie Wall Street

 

[jazdoc]

Can't believe no one's quoted the 'Big Lebowski':

Maude Lebowski: What do you do for recreation?
The Dude: Oh, the usual. I bowl. Drive around. The occasional acid flashback.

Sherry in 'Logjammin': [on video] You must be here to fix the cable.
Maude Lebowski: Lord. You can imagine where it goes from here.
The Dude: He fixes the cable?

The Dude: This is a very complicated case, Maude. You know, a lotta ins, a lotta outs, a lotta what-have-yous. And, uh, a lotta strands to keep in my head, man. Lotta strands in old Duder's head. Fortunately, I'm adhering to a pretty strict, uh, drug regimen to keep my mind, you know, uh, limber.

Walter Sobchak: Nihilists! F***me. I mean, say what you like about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it's an ethos.

The Dude: You thought that Bunny had been kidnapped and you were f***** glad, man. You could use it as an excuse to make some money disappear. All you needed was a sap to pin it on! You'd just met me! You human... paraquat! You figured 'Oh, here's a loser', you know? A deadbeat, someone the square community won't give a s***about.
The Big Lebowski: Well, aren't you?
The Dude: Well, yeah!

The Dude: Yeah, well. The Dude abides.
The Stranger: The Dude abides. I don't know about you but I take comfort in that. It's good knowin' he's out there. The Dude. Takin' 'er easy for all us sinners. Shoosh. I sure hope he makes the finals.

 

[RogerD]

Ever get lonesome?
For what?
Woman?
Full-time night woman?
l never could find no tracks
in a woman's heart.
l packed a squaw
for years, pilgrim.
Cheyenne, she was.
And the meanest bitch
that ever balled for beads!
l lodgepoled her at Dead Wolf Creek
and traded her for a Hawkin gun!


You sure are cocky
for a starving pilgrim.

You're the same dumb pilgrim
l've been hearing for 20 days...
...and smelling for !

l hunt griz.
Grizzly bears, pilgrim.
l collect the claws.
l had one in that thicket back there.
Ready to shake hands
until you came along!

From Jeremiah Johnson

 

[Gregadd]

My name is Pussy,Pussy Galore.

 

[Ron Party]

Elaine: Mostly, I remember the nights when we were together. I remember how you used to hold me and... how I used to sit on your face and wiggle.

Elaine: Ladies and gentleman, this is your stewardess speaking. We regret any inconvenience the sudden cabin movement might have caused. This is due to periodic air pockets we encountered. There's no reason to be alarmed and we hope you enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?

McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit smoking.
McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit drinking.
McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines.
McCroskey: Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.

Kramer: Loneliness, that's the bottom line. I was never happy as a child... Christmas, Ted, what does that mean to you? It was living hell. Do you know what it's like falling in the mud and getting kicked, in the head? With an iron boot? Of course you don't, no one does, that never happens. Sorry, Ted, skip that, it's a dumb question.

Reporter: What kind of plane is it?
Johnny : Oh its a big pretty white plane with red stripes, curtains in the window and wheels. It looks like a big tylenol.

Captain Oveur: Joey, did ya ever hang around a gymnasium?
Captain Oveur: Joey, do you like movies about gladiators?
Captain Oveur: Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish prison?
Captain Oveur: Have you ever seen a grown man naked?

Dr. Rumack: Captain, how soon can you land?
Captain Oveur: I can't tell.
Dr. Rumack: You can tell me. I'm a doctor.
Captain Oveur: No. I mean I'm just not sure.
Dr. Rumack: Well, can't you take a guess?
Captain Oveur: Well, not for another two hours.
Dr. Rumack: You can't take a guess for another two hours?

Male PA announcer: The red zone is for immediate loading and unloading of passengers only. There is no stopping in a white zone.
Female PA announcer: No, the white zone is for loading. There is no stopping in the red zone.
Male PA announcer: The red zone has always been for loading.
Female PA announcer: Don't you tell me which zone is for loading and which zone is for unloading.
Male PA announcer: Look Betty - don't start up with your white zone sh!t again! There is just no stopping in a white zone!
Female PA announcer: Oh really, Vernon? Why pretend? We both know perfectly well what this is about. You want me to have an abortion!
Dr. Rumack: You'd better tell the captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.
Elaine: A hospital? What is it?
Dr. Rumack: It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.

Stewardess Randy: Excuse me sir, there has been a little problem in the cockpit...
Ted Striker: The cockpit? What is it?
Randy: It's the little room in front of the plane where the pilot's in, but that's not important right now.

Ted Striker: Surely there must be something we can do about it.
Dr. Rumack: There is something we can do about it. And please, stop calling me Shirley.

Flight Control: Flight 209 you're clear for takeoff.
Clarence Oveur: Roger.
Roger Murdock: Huh?
FC: LA departure frequency 123.9.
Clarence Oveur: Roger.
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Victor Basta: Request vector, over.
Clarence Oveur: What?
FC: Flight 209 clear for vector 324.
Roger Murdock: We have clearance, Clarence.
Clarence Oveur: Roger, Roger, what's our vector, victor?
FC: Now we're in radio clearance, over.
Clarence Oveur: That's Clarence Oveur, over.
Victor Basta: Roger.
Roger Murdock: Huh?
FC: Roger, over.
Clarence Oveur: What?
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Victor Basta: Who?

Joey: Wait a minute. I know you. You're Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. You play basketball for the Los Angeles Lakers.
Roger Murdock: I'm sorry son, but you must have me confused with someone else. My name is Roger Murdock. I'm the co-pilot.
Joey: You are Kareem! I've seen you play. My dad's got season tickets.
Roger Murdock: I think you should go back to your seat now Joey. Right Clarence?
Captain Oveur: Nahhhhhh, he's not bothering anyone, let him stay here.
Roger Murdock: But just remember, my name is...
[showing his nametag]
Roger Murdock: ROGER MURDOCK. I'm an airline pilot.
Joey: I think you're the greatest, but my dad says you don't work hard enough on defense.
[Kareem's getting mad]
Joey: And he says that lots of times, you don't even run down court. And that you don't really try... except during the playoffs.
Roger Murdock: [breaking character] The hell I don't! LISTEN KID! I've been hearing that crap ever since I was at UCLA. I'm out there busting my buns every night. Tell your old man to drag Walton and Lanier up and down the court for 48 minutes.

And maybe my favorite quote:

Young Boy with Coffee: Excuse me, I happened to be passing, and I thought you might like some coffee.
Little Girl: Oh, that's very nice of you, thank you.
[takes coffee]
Little Girl: Oh, won't you sit down?
Young Boy with Coffee: Cream?
Little Girl: No, thank you, I take it black, like my men.

 

[amirm]

Capt. Vasili Borodin: I will live in Montana. And I will marry a round American woman and raise rabbits, and she will cook them for me. And I will have a pickup truck... maybe even a "recreational vehicle." And drive from state to state. Do they let you do that?
Captain Ramius: I suppose.
Capt. Vasili Borodin: No papers?
Captain Ramius: No papers, state to state.
Capt. Vasili Borodin: Well then, in winter I will live in... Arizona. Actually, I think I will need two wives.
Captain Ramius: Oh, at least.

---------

Capt. Bart Mancuso: [Ramius comments in Russian to Borodin that Mancuso is a "buckaroo". Ryan laughs] What's so funny?
Jack Ryan: Ah, the Captain seems to think you're some kind of... cowboy.
Captain Ramius: [in Russian] You speak Russian.
Jack Ryan: [in Russian] A little. It is wise to study the ways of ones adversary. Don't you think?
Captain Ramius: [in English] It is.

- The Hunt for Red October

 

[JackD201]

"Learned a new word today. Atom bomb. It was like the God taking a photograph."

young Christian Bale in Empire of the Sun

 

[rsbeck]

"Don't you put that evil on me, Ricky Bobby!"

"Hakuna Matata, bitches!"

"So when you say psychosomatic, you mean like he could start a fire with his thoughts?"

"I basically wake up every morning and p*ss excellence."

"I like to picture Jesus in a tuxedo T-Shirt..."

"I like to think of Jesus with giant eagles wings, singin' lead vocals for Lynyrd Skynyrd with, like, an angel band..."

"Dear eight pound, six ounce, newborn Baby Jesus, in your golden, fleece diapers..."

"Help me Oprah! Help me Jewish God! Help me Allah! AAAAAGGGGHHH I'm on fire! Help me Tom Cruise!!!"

"These kids are my grandchildren, and you are raisin' 'em wrong."

"Shut up, Chip, or I'll go ape-sh*t on your ass!"

"Chip, I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey."

"What is wrong with you?"

"I'm all jacked up on Mountain Dew."

"You gonna let your sons talk to their grandfather like that?"

"I sure as hell am, Chip. I love the way they're talking to you. 'Cause they're winners. Winners get to do what they want."

"Hell, the only thing you ever done right was make a smokin' hot daughter and that is IT!!"

"Shake and bake! What does that do to you? Does that blow your mind?"

"That just HAPPENED!"


-- Talladega Nights

 

[rsbeck]

"Remember Sammy Jenkis."

"I've got this condition."

"I use habit and routine to make my life possible."

"Lenny!"

"OK, so what am I doing? Oh, I'm chasing this guy. No...he's chasing me."

"I don't.....feel drunk."

"I told my boss about your condition and he said, "try and rent him another room."

"So how many rooms am I checked into in this sh*t-hole?"

"Just two............so far."

"Can't remember to forget you."

"You don't know who you are. Come downstairs, I'll show you."

"Will I lie to myself to be happy? In your case Teddy? Yes, I will."

-- Memento

 

[jazdoc]

You see, boys forget what their country means by just reading The Land of the Free in history books. Then they get to be men they forget even more. Liberty's too precious a thing to be buried in books, Miss Saunders. Men should hold it up in front of them every single day of their lives and say: I'm free to think and to speak. My ancestors couldn't, I can, and my children will. Boys ought to grow up remembering that.

--Mr. Smith Goes To Washington

 

[rsbeck]

"When a man's partner is killed, he's supposed to do something about it."

"Keep on riding me and they're gonna be picking iron out of your liver."

"The cheaper the crook, the gaudier the patter."

"Are we going to talk about the black bird?"

"If I know you can't afford to kill me, how are you gonna scare me into giving it to you?"

"When you're slapped, you'll take it and like it."

"You imbecile. You bloated idiot. You stupid fat-head!"

"People lose teeth talking like that. If you want to hang around, you'll be polite."

"You killed Miles and you're going over for it."

"The chances are you'll get off with life. That means if you're a good girl, you'll be out in 20 years. I'll be waiting for you."

"If they hang you, I'll always remember you."

-- Maltese Falcon

 

[rsbeck]

"What's the difference between you and me?"

"I'm not wearing hockey pads."


-- The Dark Knight

 

[rsbeck]

"Hey, whataya gonna do, nice college boy, didn't want to get mixed up
in the Family business. Now you wanna gun down a police captain?
Why, 'cause he slapped ya in the face a little?"

"What do you think this is the Army, where you shoot 'em a mile away?
You've gotta get up close like this and bada-bing! you blow their
brains all over your nice Ivy League suit."


-- James Caan, Godfather, Part 1

 

[rsbeck]

"They got the metric system."

"THIS is a tasty burger!"

"Does Marcellus Wallace look like a bitch?"

"English, motherf*cker, do you speak it?!"

"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides....."

"Five long years he hid this watch up his ass. When he died of
dysentery, he give the watch to me. I hid this uncomfortable hunk of
metal up my ass two more years. And now, little man, I give this watch
to you."

"Oh man, I shot Marvin in the face."

"Get the gimp."

"I'm gonna call a coupla hard-pipe-hittin' niggers and go to work on
Holmes here with a pair of pliers and a blowtorch. You hear that,
Hillbilly Boy? I'm gonna get Medieval on yo' ass."

"Stay cool, Honey Bunny."

"I'm just gonna walk the earth."

"What do you mean, 'walk the earth?'"

"Like Caine from Kung Fu."


-- Pulp Fiction