Did you try introducing a CH or Dag line preamplfier in the system with their own amplfiers? My experience with REF40 in ARC amplfiiers was inconclusive - sometimes I preferred direct, others with the REF40. And I dislike ARC preamplifiers with D'Agostino - they need their own preamplifier. But is is just me!
I'm glad you understand it's just you, as that combination is quite special We've even used it at last year's LA show... Listening to it right now, and it's amazing.
Oh, and I remember we've compared the SELECT II (purely as a preamp, using another DAC connected to its analog inputs) against an Eistein preamp loaded with NOS tubes, driving D'Agostino and later EMM Labs monoblocks. SELECT II was better, even the Eistein owner admitted it...
cheers,
Alex