Ian, for me it is not so much about not wanting a palpable, holographic semblance of a musician or drum kit laid out in my listening room, but more about not wanting precisely etched outlined images of musicians. I am not advocating for a really diffuse, undefined swirl of sounds with no sense of where the instruments are relative to each other or no sense of the soundstage laid out in front of me. I think Al and I are describing a range somewhere between those two extremes which we find is preferable and what sounds most natural to us and what is more similar to what we hear from live performances.
I am saying that I do not want to hear an outlined image of a musician playing his saxophone just outside my right speaker, a figure 6'-2" tall with the horn opening just below his belt buckle. If the recording allows it, I want to have some idea of the space in which the recording was made, a localization of the musicians and their instruments relative to other musicians and their instruments, a sense of scale and layering, depth, height and width.
What I am increasingly less interested in are "cut out" and precise images of the performers in front of me because when I close my eyes in the chamber setting with three instruments, the BSO with one hundred instruments, or a person speaking in front of me, I do not "see" such carefully defined images. I hear the origins from where the energy is created and how it develops as it fills the space. I hear that energy and how it reacts within the room. The tone, the beauty, and the message is what is important.