The WBF humor and joke thread.
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The Husband Store
'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'
so she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3- These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4- These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5- These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6- You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.
The Third, Fourth, Fifth and Sixth Floors have never been visited.
A store that sells new husbands has opened in Nashville, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1- These men Have Jobs
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2- These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1- These men Have Jobs
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2- These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'
so she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3- These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4- These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5- These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6- You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.
Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a NewWives store just across the street.
The First Floor has wives that love sex.
The Second Floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer
PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a NewWives store just across the street.
The First Floor has wives that love sex.
The Second Floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer
The Third, Fourth, Fifth and Sixth Floors have never been visited.
Why seniors never change their password !!
WINDOWS: Please enter your new password.
USER: Cabbage
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.
USER: Boiled cabbage
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.
USER: 1 boiled cabbage
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces
USER: 50damnboiledcabbages
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain at least one upper case character
USER: 50DAMNboiledcabbages
WINDOWS: Sorry the password cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively.
USER:50damnBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDon'tGiveMeAccessNow!
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation.
USER:ReallyPissedOff50DamnBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDontGiveMeAccessNow
WINDOWS: Sorry, that password is already in use
WINDOWS: Please enter your new password.
USER: Cabbage
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.
USER: Boiled cabbage
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.
USER: 1 boiled cabbage
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces
USER: 50damnboiledcabbages
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain at least one upper case character
USER: 50DAMNboiledcabbages
WINDOWS: Sorry the password cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively.
USER:50damnBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDon'tGiveMeAccessNow!
WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation.
USER:ReallyPissedOff50DamnBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDontGiveMeAccessNow
WINDOWS: Sorry, that password is already in use
Only an old, original CD (part of the old, original CD collection I intend literally to throw out or donate) which I never listen to. I never liked that album musically.
(But if you’re trying to catch me as a musically illiterate audiophile then just ask me how many versions I have of Famous Blue Raincoat or Night on Bald Mountain.)
And a terribly digitally recorded/mastered album. The first 2 Dire Straits albums
are analog all the way and sound great. I think “Brothers in arms” was given away when you bought a new Sony CD player. Knopfler got en armored with digital when he produced a terrible album for Dylan.
Never liked it either. In fact, I truly hate it. I find it obnoxious. I was a big fan of their very first album though!
Nah, if I wanted to do that, I'd ask how many Elgar records you have.
Sometimes my humor slips past...
For all of those audiophiles who have children studying to take the math section of the SAT for college admissions:
"An orchestra of 120 players takes 40 minutes to play Beethoven’s 9th Symphony. How long would it take for 60 players to play the symphony? Let P be the number of players and T the time playing.”
"An orchestra of 120 players takes 40 minutes to play Beethoven’s 9th Symphony. How long would it take for 60 players to play the symphony? Let P be the number of players and T the time playing.”
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